The ubiquitous “they” say that the adolescent years are a time of formation. It is a time when the character is formed, when the child becomes an adult. What “they” don’t tell you is that “they” are speaking of the parents, not the teenagers.
LightGirl is rushing headlong down the road of adolescence. She is giddily lapping up the days. Rejoicing in each moment. At a wedding on Saturday, she was overjoyed to repeat to each waiter time and again that, no she did not want any wine, she was “only 12.” As her mother, I felt faint each time it happened. Yes, she is tall and lovely … but she is ONLY 12 for heaven’s sake. Gawky and stilt-walky in her too-long legs and too-tall shoes. Goofy with her hair that won’t work right yet because she’s still learning. And oh-my-goodness I don’t think I will survive the moment by moment dance recitals. No this is not a dance recital that one views, this is a dance where one must listen to a recital of the moment by moment review of events and then an instant replay of the new moves the dancer has learned. The new moves which appear as frightening spasms out of the context of the dance.
Sunday came yet another new experience. I attended my first hockey game. I found that I am not a good sports parent. When LightGirl first got onto the ice, she had the same look on her face that she used to have during multiplication drills. It was not a look I have any patience for. I found myself wanting to yell advice at her. No, commands. Anything to make that look go away. To get her to skate faster and do better. Not be so gawky. Be perfect during her second ever game. Not that I have high standards or anything … yeesh. I was fortunate to be sitting next to some very chill parents who encouraged me when I grumbled. The coach gave me a good visual and more encouragement for how well LightGirl is doing after the game. Today we discovered (during her private lesson) that the poor girl’s skates are too small and she has been wearing her shin pads incorrectly!! But her mechanics are great. It might be that when her feet don’t hurt and when she is able to bend her knees, she’ll come alive. Perhaps her mother will gain a little patience as well 😉
Perhaps adolescence is time when we’ll both develop a little character.
